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The Spazmatics

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The Spazmatics

The Spazmatics were born in the spring of 1983 when physics professor Kevin Stigwood of Alta Dena High in Thousand Oaks California, lost a debate over String Theory to an upstart pupil in front of the entire student body and faculty. As agreed to by both parties, the loser would have to do anything that the winner demanded, and the victorious prodigy demanded that Mr. Stigwood perform “She Blinded Me With Science” by Thomas Dolby during half-time at an upcoming state basketball championship game.

Having no musical background and desperate to not go down in total humiliation, Professor Stigwood formed The Spazmatics by tapping the genius of electronics teacher Sydney Balderman (AKA “Syd Sonic”), who had achieved international acclaim in 1981 for his invention of “robot drums.” When Balderman (who was also the girls water polo coach at Alta Dena Middle School) explained that most of the music could be generated by computers, and that all he needed was a couple of decent musicians to complete The Spazmatics, Stigwood was ecstatic. To make The Spazmatics complete, Stigwood brought in his special needs brother Curtis on bass, and teacher’s assistant Rusty A. Woosmeir (AKA “The Raw”) on guitar.When The Spazmatics took center court that evening, members of the hip elite began heckling them with jibes of “geek” and “nerd,” while everyone else howled with laughter. But once they broke into the opening salvo of “Science,” the nonbelievers were stunned by the group’s authenticity of production, world class musicianship, and tight choreography. The Spazmatics performance came to a climax when Stigwood grabbed one of the cheerleaders and began doing the “Belinda” up and down the court with her in tow. When it was all over, the crowd rose in a standing ovation, and The Spazmatics were born.

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